grief today & every day (plus Alica Forneret)

Morning friends. It is a veritable shitshow in the world. Over on my IG, we’ve got grief educators from BIPOC communities speaking on grief for the next few days, so be sure to tune in over there.

As we know, systemic racism and violence against BIPOC is not new. Grief visits communities of color at much higher rates than it does white communities: that is a fact. Black maternal death rates are higher. Complications and deaths from COVID-19 are higher in communities of color. Negative outcomes from health issues of all kinds are more prevalent in communities of color.

The firehose of pain can feel overwhelming. If you’re new in your grief, it may be hard to hold your gaze on the pain of the world at all. If that’s you, it’s ok. It’s ok to tend to your own heart. Witnessing – and being part of – such intense pain without your person is also hard. Let’s name that too. Loss upon loss upon loss.

As grieving people, you know what it’s like to lose someone. You know what it’s like to feel alone, unheard, dismissed, and corrected inside your grief. There is solidarity in grief – if you let there be solidarity inside grief.
 
As grieving people, you know what it's like to lose someone. You know what it's like to feel alone, unheard, dismissed, and corrected inside your grief. There is solidarity in grief - if you let there be solidarity inside grief. Click To Tweet  

Remember that compassion is not a scare resource if you don’t treat it that way. More for others does not mean less for you – unless you treat it that way.

Most folks here in our community are not hoarders of compassion. Most folks here won’t get into battles about whose grief is worse. Most folks honor and respect the love at the core of grief and refuse to turn their eyes and ears away. Thank you for that.

Alica Forneret‘s grief resource guide created by and for BIPOC will be linked on the refuge in grief site later today.

Thanks for being awesome.