when you try to take someone's grief away, you don't make it better.

lantern in the night on snowAs many of you have experienced first hand, our culture doesn’t know how to “do” grief. We have this over-arching idea that grief is a problem that needs to be solved, therefore all our attempts to “help” are about getting someone out of their grief.

Unfortunately, when you try to take someone’s grief away, you don’t make it better. You just let them know how uncomfortable you are with their pain.

When you try to take someone’s grief away from them, you just make them feel misunderstood and alone.

In the next few weeks, I’l be talking about more about what actually helps inside grief, and why so many things people say feel terrible, even when their intentions are good.

In the meantime, I’d love to hear what you’ve found useful inside your grief. I also don’t mind hearing your horror stories of what hasn’t helped! Sounds strange, but hearing what you’re actually experiencing out there helps me design posts, courses, books, and all sorts of things. Hearing what isn’t working for you helps me find ways to actually get you the help and support you need.

What do you wish non-grieving people would know about you, about grief, about your experience? If you had to pick one or two things you really struggle with inside your grief, what would they be?


flame-heart-100Leave a comment and let me know. I’d love to hear from you.